Second Verse...

... same as the first.

Sorry I've been such an absent Bloggy Mama lately. I just really haven't had much to say.

I lost 1.3 lbs last week. I'm down a total of 68 lbs. I should be stoked but I'm feeling very... meh. I don't know if its a bout of depression or I'm getting sick or what.

I had a decent couple of days Sunday and Monday. J came to visit and we goofed off together. We watched a movie. (We interrupt this post to bring you a mini-review of "Knocked Up". OMFG it cracked my ass up! SO FUNNY!) We also played lots of Culdacept Saga on the 360. I'm addicted to this game. It's like the bastard love child of Monopoly and the Magic the Gathering card game. It's. My. Crack.

American Idol tonight was interesting. I really like David Archuletta and Jason Castro. They both have really good voices... yet... they're completely different. Archuletta is like a giant overly friendly puppy dog and I just wanna take him home and smoosh him! Castro... I dunno what it is about him. His EYES just... entrance me. His voice makes me pay attention. I really, REALLY hate these themes for the semi-finals though. IF YER GONNA LIMIT THEIR SONG CHOICES TO A THEME... AND THEN LIMIT THE THEME TO 50 SPECIFIC SONG DO NOT DING THE CONTESTANTS FOR SONG CHOICE YOU STUPID, STUPID BASTARDS.

That is all... *cough*

Mother Nature Is TRYING to Keel Me!

Holy Cotton Undies Batman! After the busiest 2 weeks EVER... (and I'm STILL not done baking for the soldiers... Candy tomorrow) Aunt Flo has decided to visit. I'm pissy. I'm hurting. I want to be held... but I dun want anyone around me... My head hurts, my feet stink and I dun luv Jebus anymore.

Such is the state of my mood.

However, I DID loose .7 lbs last week with Thanksgiving AND PMS... Take THAT! Heheh

What Fresh Hell....

is this??? After a weekend with a sick 7 year old and today with a feeling much better 7 year old desperately trying to burn off some energy even though I want him to be still cause being off from school sick isn't SUPPOSED to be fun is more than I can handle. I'm done for the day. Nytol...

The Time Change Is Kicking My....

Ass... yeah... I said it! Today has seemed like the longest fricking day EVAH! All day long I've been thinking, "Its only 10am?" "Its only noon?" and now its like... "WTF!!! Its 10pm!!!! Aw, Hells Naw!"

I hate it when the time changes. It throws EVERYTHING off... meh.

How Low Can Ya' Go?

I want to apologize for my lack of posts lately. I seem to be loosing my resolve for a lot of things and I'm not sure why.

I seem to have hit a bit of a plateau with my weight loss. I'm more easily tempted to stray from the eating plan and yet at the same time I don't really want to eat... anything.

I'm still walking but its becoming a chore. Something I HAVE to do rather than something I WANT to do. My legs, they hurt. They're tired. So am I.

I have little or no patience with Shecky lately. I know he's tired after school but when I try to study with him or quiz him for a test its like he doesn't even try. He swears he's trying and he's focusing but I get more frustrated and angry each time he gives an incorrect answer.

I seem to be tired a lot. I'm sleeping well at night but during the day I just get so... listless. I don't want to do much of anything and when I DO make the effort to do something I'm just sort of... meh... about the whole thing.

WTF is WRONG with me lately? Is the single parenting getting to me? (Husband tries but he's not here for the day to day stuff that I get frustrated with.) Is it the lack of progress on the weight loss? Am I just going through a bit of depression again? If it IS depression do I just ride it out or do I talk to my DR about it? (By Dr I mean PCP not shrink. I dun have one of those... Mebbe I NEED one... bleh) Am I just tired of feeling alone all the time?

Husband and J are trying to make things as easy for me as possible. (J is someone very close to me and he and Husband share an apartment). They bought me a brand new laptop this past weekend and I was thrilled. Tickled pink. Unfortunately, the baseline BLEH I've been feeling is still there.

I've avoided posting in the hopes that this would just... pass. I didn't want to whine to the internets about how out of sorts I am but at this point... mebbe it will help. God knows not much else is!

I refuse to end this entry on such a downer. Here's a random story from when Shecky was a kid:

When Shecky was 2 or 3 he was OBSESSED... with Bob the Builder. I don't remember how he got introduced to that show, those characters, but he LOVED it. He was visiting my parents one summer while Dad was still finishing his build of this house. A friend of theirs was helping him. Shecky wandered out to where they were working and Dad introduced Sheck to his friend. Shecky, wide eyed and in awe, looked at this new person, holding a hammer, working on his Grandpa's house as my Dad said, "This is Mr. Bob." and then Shecky replied... "Bob... the... BUILDER!!!!" HE STILL calls him that... today... heh. Kids

{edited cause spellcheck doesn't catch it when I use the wrong word.. cough...}

Hangin' By My Fingertips....

Today... I am tired. Bone weary. I have no clue as to why. I didn't exercise in the water. I didn't do much of anything. I helped with laundry, did dishes, helped Shecky with homework, hung out with him this evening upstairs watching him play games, watching TV with him and reading. Nothing strenuous. I took a 2 hour NAP today from 11am to 1pm even. Yet, I'm so tired I can barely think.

I've eaten some oatmeal with peaches in it and some soup with cabbage, tomato, chicken and zucchini in it. Its not like I'm not eating. Its not like I'm eating junk. However, my energy level just doesn't seem to exist on any REAL level. Meh.

I'm afraid after last weeks massive weight loss this week may be a gain. I'm not eating much but I'm not DOING all that much either. Sometimes this whole weight loss roller coaster is more than I can handle mentally.

Mom is burned out. She's not on plan right now and I can't really ding her for it. She's already DONE this and lost over 100 lbs.

I'm just really struggling mentally right now. Tomorrow will be better, Right?

The Secret Word Is....

Meh! I often wonder if I will ever, EVER have a day off without someone being sick. Shecky has the runny booty today. He started out coughing last night. It has since... EVOLVED. Meh

Meh! I have 5 batches of brownies yet to bake. Meh.

Meh! I live in Houston, TX... and my Air Conditioner is broken! MEH!

Meh! I'm waiting till tonight, when its cooler out, to bake said brownies. Meh!

Meh! Apparently the runny butt issue is ... contagious. Meh.

Meh! We're having pizza anyway. Meh.

Meh! R just left for his weekend reserve duty for the month and Shecky is pouting. Meh.