Many people say your weight is just a number, as is your age. Yeah, I don't buy that in either case.
My age indicates my life experience. It indicates how much I've lived and how much I've potentially done. It's not a bad thing. It's not something to be dreaded. It just... is.
My weight, on the other hand, is a cruel, cruel mistress that I dread seeing and dealing with. It indicates how much I've failed. It shows how far off the mark I've been. It cries when it sees me coming, I SWEAR to you it does!
I have managed to gain 20 lbs in the last 2 months. First, it was the pain keeping me from moving much at all. The depression and fear that bring on the nervous munchies took over as the surgery date grew closer. After the surgery I felt WONDERFUL and I celebrated by eating whatever was handy.
Yeah, I've not done such a great job lately with that number. It's something I'm SUPPOSED to control... yet... more often than not, it controls me.
So... it's time again. I need to get off my ass and rededicate myself to my weight loss efforts. I have 2 weeks left here in Houston. Then I go back to the lake. I'm going to be more careful with what I eat and how active I am here for these next too weeks. I'll consider it a victory if I don't gain any more than I already have. Then... Katy Bar The Friggin Door.... It's ON my friends.