I had the opportunity to reflect on my relationships with my parents today. Dude, I'm totally scared of MYSELF right now.
Mom and I have a good relationship. We're friends. We enjoy doing stuff together. When American Idol is on we call each other after each performance to dish and critique. Mom talks to me about things she's having issues with. She asks my advise and I do the same. Its a reciprocal relationship. I'm really glad that we're more than just Mother and Daughter.
Dad and I are a totally different story. He's still "Daddy" and I'm still his kid. So MUCH so that I can't have an adult conversation with him. I suddenly turn into a brainless, willful, overly emotional 12 year old who just wants Daddy's approval and understanding. WTF??? Why in the Hell do I DO that? It drives me INSANE. I hate feeling like that child. I hate that when he bellows I get all... Wahhhhhh. Yanno? How did I end up with completely OPPOSITE types of relationships with my parents?
I turn 39 in a few days... why is his approval and understanding still something I need so badly? I'm a good mom. I'm a decent wife. I'm a GREAT friend. I'm smart. I'm funny. I'm witty. I'm a dork. I know all this. Why is it so flippin' important that HE recognize it?
Meh. Mebbe I'm just overtired....